mcguire greedily: October 2012

Friday, October 26, 2012

Online Dating Without OkCupid: One Couple's Social Media Story ...

Joining online dating sites still carries a stigma for some. But what about meeting your significant other through social media platforms completely unrelated to the dating world, like Facebook, Twitter or even LinkedIn?

Barbara Maldonado knows a little something about finding a match online, without the help of OkCupid or Match.com's love algorithms. From her initial interactions with her fianc? Russell Roering, to their comical (and cute) engagement story, this social media-savvy pair used an incredible amount of technology to solidify a romantic relationship.

"We had an in-real-life meeting that was facilitated by a tweetup," Maldonado stated recently in an interview with HuffPost Live. ("Tweetups" or Twitter meet-ups, happen when people come together in the real world for an event that was organized through Twitter.) "It was a book signing by Chris Brogan, who wrote this social media book, 'Trust Agent.' So we had that in common."

But the social media connection didn't end there. Maldonado said she "knew there was something" because the man she'd met at the book signing sent her a LinkedIn request and began following her blog, all within the same morning.

"Then it was at a FourSquare birthday party that I saw that he was going to a few months later that we reconnected," Maldonado said. "And I used a Groupon as an excuse to get a date even quicker from him."

By this point in their relationship, Maldonado and Roering had used a five social media platforms to connect -- but the couple's engagement story is what really takes the cake, so to speak.

"He did leak the photo of my engagement ring on Pinterest, which then published to Facebook, which I saw and I started crying because I thought he was kidding!" Maldonado told HuffPost Live. Still not understanding that the real proposal was coming, she asked her soon-to-be fianc?, "How could you do this! My mom's going to see this." Scrapping his plans to propose to her the following day, Roering popped the question the same evening he posted on Pinterest.

(You can see the photo of the engagement ring on Pinterest, here.)

Our own Bianca Bosker published an in-depth article in Huffington. magazine about the interesting dynamic in meeting someone romantically, through non-romantic sites. She states these websites "put users in a position to meet a significant other without having to admit they need dating help," while also offering a "courtship process more akin to what people hope for offline."

Have you seen a Facebook profile and wanted to chat, or been totally charmed by someone who retweeted one of your post on Twitter? Do you think dating online should be contained to specific dating websites? Sound off in the comments section, or tweet us @HuffPostTech. Then check out the gallery (below) to see the 11 things you should never do on OKCupid.

Don't Exaggerate
Sometimes we embellish the truth, particularly when we want to impress a possible mate. But <a href="http://www.eflirtexpert.com/about-laurie" target="_hplink">Laurie Davis from eFlirt</a> warns us against exaggerating. "Overplaying your lifestyle will attract different matches who, ultimately, won't be the best fit for who you really are," she says. And <a href="http://cyberdatingexpert.com/" target="_hplink">cyber dating expert Julie Spira</a> agrees, also noting there is a huge difference between fibbing about your height vs. your martial status. "Single is single, and divorced is divorced," she says.
Don't Answer All Of OkCupid's 'Questions'
One of OkCupid's features is a "Questions" section that allows users to reveal a few more facts about themselves. These factoids are then matched via an algorithm with other people who answered similarly. Questions can be answered publicly or privately, meaning your answers can be seen or hidden. But Spira thinks some questions are best left unanswered. She tells users to be careful with those that seem too political or sexual in nature because this data is all over the Internet: "You need to think every time you push the send button." She also says for public answers, you should "only pick the questions you would tell your mother [the answer to]."
Don't Assume The Right Person Will Magically Appear
Davis says her biggest online dating no-no is complacency. "If you're not utilizing all the functionality a site offers, you miss out on the experience. Rather than complaining that you're receiving messages from matches you'd rather not meet, search and message some on your own," she advises. While this is true of all online dating sites, Davis stresses the importance of reaching out on OkCupid. "[It's]one of the fastest-growing sites, which is an advantage, but make sure you're not being lost in someone's search results by being proactive on your own as well."
Don't Use Old Profile Pictures
If you're thinking of putting up a profile pic from 2004 -- reconsider. "They are going to look you up on Google; they are going to look you up on Facebook," says Spira of potential dates. "I think it's really important to have recent profile pictures. You're thanked a lot for being recognizable and having truth in the advertising." So skip out on that glamour shot from the '90s. And men -- most of us agree that the muscle shot in front of the bathroom mirror is an automatic "skip."
Don't Be A Rude Rejector
Just like in real life, there are right and wrong ways to reject someone in the virtual world. "I don't believe in burning digital bridges," Spira says. "Why should you have to email someone and say, 'Hey you're not my type.' Dont say you're not my type -- you haven't met yet!" But if you really aren't attracted, Spira says just move on. Don't message them back, or simply thank them for the communication and wish them luck in their search.
Don't Check Your Profile Obsessively
OkCupid's popular free edition of its dating service comes with a few catches, one of which includes people knowing when you check into the site. While possible soulmates won't know how long you've been online, they can view the time you last logged on. "It can be very obsessive and dangerous to your emotional health," Spira says about online daters who get addicted to flipping through OkCupid. For example, what if you go on a great date only to realize that 30 minutes after you parted ways, your date accessed the site two more times that night? Spira reminds users to "take a deep breath and don't jump to a digital conclusion."
Don't Withhold Too Much
It's important to fill out OkCupid's "About" section to receive matches with similar interests. "Skimping on details will hurt you instead of help," Davis says. "The ultimate goal of your profile is to give someone a quick snapshot of your life. The more details you include, the more interactive your profile becomes, encouraging matches to message you because they enjoy the same?activities." By adding a few facts about yourself, it's easier for possible dates to start conversation -- both virtually and in the real world.
Don't Come Off As Desperate
Nobody wants to read on your profile that you've "tried this once before, but you're back one last time for more!" Forgo fishing for compliments or talking yourself down throughout OkCupid's "About" section, and let digital relationships run their course. Share information concisely and positively with people who match your interests ... unless you happen to be in the market for the desperate sort.
Don't Use The '3-Day Rule' Online
"There is no digital equivalent of the 3-day rule," Davis says, noting our connected society has pretty much destroyed the idea of an ideal timeframe for response. "Today, responding quick doesn't necessarily mean you're pining away in front of your laptop all night. The OkCupid app sends notifications in real time, allowing you to compose a response quickly and easily, even when you're on the go." Both Spira and Davis agree responding in a timely manner is usually the best method to snatching up the right guy or girl.
Don't Obscure Your Intentions
If you don't want to just hook up, and are looking for a little bit more in the relationship department, how do you present yourself? "What can seem sleazy to one person might be flirty to another. Make sure you stay on the right side of the gray line by keeping your intentions in check and acting according to what you're looking for," Davis says.
Don't Forget About The Buddy System
There are a few instances where your friends should be involved in the online dating process. First, Spira suggest you have a buddy proofread your profile for spelling errors and accuracy. When you finally find a match, make sure a friend has the lowdown on where you're going for the evening. Online meetups in public places are common, but it doesn't hurt to have a friend know you went to see the latest movie, or that you plan on being out for a certain amount of time.

CORRECTION: The original version of this article misstated the day Roering proposed to Maldonado.

Related on HuffPost:

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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/24/online-dating-without-dat_n_2009033.html

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Thursday, October 25, 2012

Modern Japanese Ecovillage House Brings Nature Inside, Literally ...

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

In a concerted effort to harmonize recycling, water and energy use some years ago, citizens, community leaders and researchers collaborated on the creation of a 1,000-person ecovillage in Shiga prefecture, located near Kyoto, Japan. Earlier this year, Shiga-based architects Sumiou Mizumoto and Yoshitaka Kuga of ALTS Design Office completed the Kofunaki House, a lovely example of integrating nature with dwelling in this new eco-community.

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

The house's open interior uses the natural surfaces of wood, combined with ample natural lighting and strategically-placed gravel gardens to evoke a sense of changing seasons. Small trees, succulents and shrubs poke out of the interior gardens, a conscious effort to bring nature inside, weaving it into the daily activities of the family.

It's a counterpoint to conventional housing's separation from nature, say the architects on ArchDaily:

A home is [usually] divided inside and outside completely, and [nature] is not considered, but [the in Kofunaki house] inside and outside are connected more gently, and people are beginning to make the space which [one] can always feel woods, feel nature, and enjoy the season which moves and passes away.

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

The entry area is modelled after the doma of the traditional Japanese farmhouse (minka). The doma is a floor of packed earth historically used for cooking and storing water -- it is the entry area before one steps up onto the raised floor of the house. Here in Kofunaki House the doma is transformed into a transitional area blending inside and out, thanks to the suggestive gravel garden and staggered planks of wood which act as stepping stones of sorts.

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

Within the 1,400 square-foot home there is a distinct sense of harmony in the overlap of spaces and viewpoints throughout the house; the open-riser stair and the bridge connecting the upstairs office and sleeping areas helps greatly in this aspect.

Spaces are gently separated with the use of translucent curtains rather than solid walls, adding to the fluid feel of the design.

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

? Yuta Yamada/Fujishokai

Though there's not much said on what specific kinds of materials and methods were used, aesthetically and philosophically the Kofunaki House presents a fresh, modern take on what housing in a contemporary ecovillage might look like: open, unassuming yet full of distinctive touches. More over at ALTS Design Office and ArchDaily.

Source: http://www.treehugger.com/green-architecture/kofunaki-eco-village-house-alts-design-office.html

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Wednesday, October 24, 2012

ECB's Draghi faces German lawmakers

BERLIN (AP) ? The European Central Bank's president drew a broadly positive response from German lawmakers Wednesday when he told them that his bond-buying plan won't stoke inflation and will not allow struggling countries to backslide on economic reforms.

In an effort to win over skeptical public opinion in Europe's biggest economy, Mario Draghi met for two hours at Berlin's Reichstag building with more than 100 politicians, including members of the budget, finance and European affairs committees.

He said afterward that the closed-doors exchange was "an important component of confidence-building, trust-building."

The ECB last month announced its plan to buy unlimited amounts of short-term bonds of troubled euro economies ? a program aimed at keeping a lid on the borrowing costs of indebted countries such as Spain and Italy.

Although Chancellor Angela Merkel's government supports the plan, the president of Germany's central bank, Jens Weidmann, argues that they come too close to using the ECB's power to print money to support governments' finances directly, which the bank isn't allowed to do.

And there are worries in Germany that unlimited bond purchases could undermine the ECB's official mission of fighting inflation.

Draghi tackled those concerns in remarks to the gathering released by the ECB, insisting that investors' "unfounded fears about the future of the euro area had to be removed."

"The only way to do so was to establish a fully credible backstop against disaster scenarios," he said.

Draghi highlighted the fact that bond-buying will only be triggered once countries apply for help from European rescue funds ? which impose conditions for granting aid.

And, he insisted, the purchases "will not lead to inflation."

"In our assessment, the greater risk to price stability is currently falling prices in some euro area countries," he said. "In this sense, (bond purchases) are not in contradiction to our mandate: in fact, they are essential for ensuring we can continue to achieve it."

Norbert Barthle, a senior lawmaker with Merkel's Christian Democrats, appeared satisfied. He told reporters that the Italian "struck us as a Prussian southern European."

"His answers were very convincing, and so I think we can send the message to German citizens that the worries about inflation that have been expressed here and there are unfounded," he added.

Parliament speaker Norbert Lammert, also a Christian Democrat, said the meeting "contributed a lot to understanding each other's concerns and intentions somewhat better" and to building confidence.

The ECB head argued that the bond program "will not lead to disguised financing of governments" because bonds will be bought from investors on so-called secondary markets, not from governments.

Draghi repeated his oft-stated mantra that it is up to governments to fix their finances, reform their economies and work together to improve the eurozone's structure ? which is line with official thinking in Germany.

He maintained that bond purchases won't create "excessive risks" for European taxpayers because "such risks would only materialize if a country were to run unsound policies." But that, he added, is "explicitly prohibited" by eurozone rescue fund programs.

No country has yet sought to tap the new ECB program, though Spain faces pressure to given the parlous state of its economy and its elevated borrowing costs.

Germany's Parliament would have to approve any application for money from the eurozone's own rescue funds ? an application that is necessary before the ECB can act to assist a eurozone nation.

Some lawmakers suggested they weren't convinced it made sense for the independent central bank to link its actions to financial policy conditions.

And Carsten Schneider, a budget committee member for the opposition Social Democrats, said concerns about extra risks to taxpayers remained.

But he argued that foot-dragging by Merkel was responsible for "the current situation that the ECB is moving away from its normal mandate of ... fighting inflation and taking on tasks to save the euro that it is not actually created for."

Though rhetoric in Germany on the bond-buying program has sometimes been shrill, the atmosphere Wednesday was calm. "The tone was, as is customary in German politics, civil," said Social Democrat Joachim Poss.

Asked whether he considered his mission of winning over German public opinion accomplished, Draghi laughed and said: "Oh, that would be too ambitious."

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/ecbs-draghi-faces-german-lawmakers-132012247--finance.html

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Obama to Do Live MTV Q&A Friday

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Jane Fonda Signs on for ABC Comedy Pilot

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Friday, October 26, 2012

Online Dating Without OkCupid: One Couple&#39;s Social Media Story ...

Don't Exaggerate

Don't Answer All Of OkCupid's 'Questions'

Don't Assume The Right Person Will Magically Appear

Don't Use Old Profile Pictures

Don't Be A Rude Rejector

Don't Check Your Profile Obsessively

Don't Withhold Too Much

Don't Come Off As Desperate

Don't Use The '3-Day Rule' Online

Don't Obscure Your Intentions

Don't Forget About The Buddy System

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Modern Japanese Ecovillage House Brings Nature Inside, Literally ...

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

ECB's Draghi faces German lawmakers

Obama to Do Live MTV Q&A Friday

Online Dating Without OkCupid: One Couple's Social Media Story ...